Upon
leaving Tucson I drove east toward beautiful mountains and away from the desert
sunset. The Oregon mountain range was ahead of me, mirroring the colors of the
sunset. The mountains took on a deep purple hue. The mesmerizing sky above them
faded from pink to yellow to green to blue. Hozhoni.
When
I first arrived in Silver City, Erica wasn’t out of auditions yet so I bellied
up to a local bar and ordered a delicious amber ale from a local brewery. I was
the only customer in the bar other than an older man sucked into the Pro Bowl
game on the TV. I soon became fascinated with the bartender, Dustin, asking him
tons of obnoxious questions about his music and the time he spent living in a
hippie commune. When Erica finished, I tipped Dustin well and said farewell.
Erica
is a good friend from home. We played tennis together in high school and we
share a love for vegetarianism and movies with sick, dark humor. She is engaged
to the love of her life, Flavio, whom she met playing tennis at Western. They
are a precious couple. After a late night snack of delicious veggie burgers, we
called it a night.
In
the morning the guys who work at the Hike and Bike shop got me excited about
some great hiking in the area. I chose to go up Gomez Peak just north of town.
Halfway up the peak I stopped on a plateau to admire the century plants. They’re
actually more like skeletons of century plants this time of year, as they have
long since bloomed and released their seeds to the wind. There were dozens of
tall plant skeletons reaching up to the heavens. Some stood straight up while
others leaned over like masts in a harbor after a hurricane. I continued up the
trail toward the peak. The last 30 yards of the trail is a steep natural stone
staircase that gives the feel of climbing up the spine of a sleeping dragon.
The view from the top was incredible. The perch overlooked the town of Silver
City and a distant mountain range to the south. The Gila National Forest spans
for hundreds of miles to the north, rounded mountains covered in pinion trees.
I caught my breath on a rock wall on the summit of Gomez Peak and tried to take it all
in. The sun was peeking out from
behind slow moving clouds that seemed close enough to reach up and touch. I sat
on the mountaintop alone and felt the warm sunshine on my cheeks. The chilly
breeze blew through my hair, and then I felt hot tears stream down my face. The
weight of this trip had caught up to me, and I was humbled. I was humbled by
the love I shared with so many amazing people over the past three weeks. I was
humbled by their belief in me, their faith in
my abilities and the idea that they will always be on my team. In that moment, I knew that I
could never settle for a mediocre life. I’ve always known that beauty and
connection existed in the world, but I now know that I can go find it and also that
I have the ability to create it.
This trip has confirmed my suspicions that human connection makes life matter. I saw some beautiful sights on this trip. But the
past 3 weeks would have been nothing without the insightful conversations, the
meals shared, the laughter, the love. I was alone for a lot of this trip but
not once did I feel lonely. I found that I have friends everywhere, some I just
hadn’t met yet. Even when I was by myself, they were all there with me. You
were there with me. I let the weight of these realizations wash over me. The
beautiful scenery went blurry as I wept.
The
next morning I had a big day planned out. I was planning on heading north on
highway 15 to hike Signal Peak. From there I would drop in to see the Gila
cliff dwellings. On the way back I was going to hit the Gila hot springs. I’ve
been trying to incorporate hot springs into this trip ever since Tori and I
planned on visiting the Ouray hot springs but got distracted by cold beer in
Telluride. Tori and I even stopped at the Rico hot springs, a very secret and
remote pool on the Dolores River in Colorado. We hiked through the snow with high
expectations only to see a naked hippie inhabiting the pool, guzzling a bottle
of schnapps when we got there. We passed up that opportunity, and I’ve been
hell bent on finding a hot spring since then.
I missed the turn to Signal Peak,
so I adjusted the plan to hike it on the way back. 30 miles later I saw the
sign to the hot springs and adjusted my plan again to see the cliff dwellings after
a quick dip in the toasty pool.
5
hours of luxurious soaking later, the cliff dwellings were closed and it was
too late to hike. Once I had immersed my body in the steaming spring and couldn’t
make myself leave. I spent the entire day soaking in two different pools, doing
yoga by the river, reading, meditating, and lying in the sun. It was absolutely
wonderful. For the first few hours, I was alone. In the afternoon I was joined
by two men from New York, then two more from Boulder. The men from Boulder,
Sandy and Ray, were both psychiatrists who do the kind of work I am interested
in doing someday. Ray is 84 years old and sharp as a tack. He gave me great advice.
‘Darrah,
there are two things that will give you a happy life. The first is to work to
keep your memory intact. The second is…..What was the second one again?’ he
questioned, turning to Sandy. We laughed and talked for quite some time as
these men gave me incredible advice on how to be kind and effective in the
field of metal health. We exchanged information before the men left. Two more
gentlemen arrived who were on a road trip from Washington. We talked tennis and
football until I couldn’t take the sun and heat anymore and decided it was time
to head home.
My
day at the springs was much needed. Sometimes I find that I get stuck in ‘go’
mode. I feel as if I need to be three places at once and I need to be there by
yesterday. As difficult as it was for me to skip a hike and a neat sight, I
needed rest. As incredible as this trip has been, it has also been taxing on my
mind and body. Thinking about all the places I’ve been, the miles I’ve
traveled, and the work I’m going back to makes me tired. It was necessary to
take a day to force myself to sit still. Because I did that I met Ray and
Sandy, who I will use and abuse as references in my future endeavors. Sometimes
it pays just to sit still and enjoy a beautiful day.
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